7. The latecomer
There’s always someone who pops into a room that’s been going for, like, five hours and who wants a personalized recap of what was previously said. They usually say something like, “Hey, yo, I’m just hopping in… uh… what are we talking about? Actually, never mind, here’s what I think.”
6. The ASMR-er
Ma’am. Sir. You don’t talk like that in real life. Please stop using your sexy voice to discuss freelance contracts.
5. The lil bro
You really don’t need to refer to complete strangers as “big bro” every time they hop on stage. Act like you’re talking to a human and not Sean Combs. “I’m just saying, big bro. I really wanna build with you, big bro. Help me out, big bro.”
4. The hate listener
There’s always someone who goes to Twitter and talks about how much they hate Clubhouse and how toxic it is. Meanwhile, they spend at least eight hours a day bouncing from room to room and loving every minute of it.
3. LLC bro
There’s never a dull moment for the man who hops onto Clubhouse to tell you to invest in bitcoin and start up your LLCs and have brunch with Jay-Z… all from the comfort of his mother’s basement.
2. The FOMO-er
This is the person who thinks a Clubhouse membership makes them part of the elite, so all they talk about is what you missed on Clubhouse. Fam, nobody cares that Jaleel White and Riff Raff were in a room debating M&M’s vs. Skittles.
1. Thanos
This person becomes a moderator and proceeds to act as if they possess all of the power in the world. You’re not suddenly the 46th president of the United States. Relax.
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