Halloween is the season when squares cut loose and dress sexy for perhaps the only time all year—but not all attempts to dress sexy actually come across that way. In fact, there are some costumes so gross or baffling, they could make one impotent for the night. Spot any of these? Look away, quickly!
10. Sexy Boba Tea
Why is this ranked so low? Because we would.
9. Naughty Nun
This trope is played out. And it makes Jesus sad.
8. D**k in a Box
That video was from 2006, bro. Put it away.
7. Stay-Puft Marshmallow
Stay puffy, if you must.
6. Sexy Chucky
Along with Sexy Freddy Krueger, making the killer doll from Child's Play hot is not it. Is it supposed to be sexy and scary? Like do dirty things to me and then kill me? You're not a praying mantis, but we'd like to see that as a sexy costume.
5. Any Disney Princess
Most Disney princesses are barely pubescent, don't try to sex them up.
4. Genie's Lamp
Stop trying to get rubbed, they're on to you.
3. Flamin' Hot Cheetos
It's hot, yes, but in a way that makes people hungry, not horny.
2. Girl Scout
No. Just no.
1. A Giant Penis
Like sending a d**k pic that people can't delete or hide. Plus, there's a much better, more playful, and more subtle alternative: eggplant emoji.