The 10 Best Pizza Toppings, Ranked

10. Pineapple

You will invite scorn by being one of those "ham and pineapple" Hawaiian-style pizza eaters, but if this is your jam, just own it. Aloha, or whatever.

9. Tomatoes

Doesn't always work on pizzas—it's all juicy and seedy—but sometimes you wanna pair that with a super-dry crust and sit at that perfect pizza middleground.

8. Mushrooms

There are those who will tell you that mushrooms taste like dirt. These are people who never ate dirt as a kid and don't know that sometimes dirt is just what you're craving. Embrace dirty!

7. Hot honey

A recent addition to our orders, this pairs well with pepperoni on, say, a Detroit-crust pizza. Save some of that honey for the bedroom later in case you’re up for, ahem, a late-night snack. Yes, we are still talking about pizza!

6. Olives

You're in or you're very out with these. We're in.

5. Basil

You'd be surprised how much this enhances the flavor of your pizza and how hard it is to get at pizza spots unless you're at a fancy Neapolitan pizza restaurant. Grow that stuff at home and carry it in your suit jacket pocket like a very fancy gentleman who always smells like basil.

4. Sausage

"Hamburger" is a garbage topping unworthy of your love, but good Italian sausage or sausage meatballs can give a pizza that tangy spike it need.

3. Onions

Yes, it counts as a veggie. Eat your damn veggies.

2. Bacon

Not huge slabs of pork belly, but small, crispy accents across the pizza. Bacon bits serve this purpose well. Why don't pizzarias give you bacon bits like they do with parmesan and crushed pepper packets?

1. Pepperoni

Pepperoni is super oily (just look at the mess it made on the pizza box) and probably terrible for your colon, but that's why they're so good. Whether it's wider than a half dollar coin or those little "cup and char" kind, these are the ultimate crowd pleaser. Cowabunga, dude.

The 10 Greatest, Most Essential Pizza Toppings, Ranked